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"Halt! Officer Odie orders you to stop and help!"
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(The episode opens above Jon's house. Inside, Jon is feeding Garfield breakfast, and the orange cat holds a fork in one hand and a spoon in the other)
Jon: Now, Garfield, I know you're not going to like this but Liz insists that you have to lose 10 pounds, so we're putting you on a diet of carrot sticks and lettuce. (Garfield simply glances down at the plate of healthy food with a smile on his face) Now before you say anything or throw a fit because it isn't pasta, please understand, we're doing this for your own good.
Garfield: Chuckles (he then stabs a carrot with his fork and eats it)
Jon: (flabbergasted) You understand? You're not gonna put up a fight or steal the refrigerator or anything?
Garfield: Shakes his head no
Jon: Oh, well this is great! Let me get you some low-calorie salad dressing. (He leaves for the kitchen)
Garfield: (Looking at his wrist where a watch would normally be, despite the fact that he's not wearing a watch) Perfect, he'll be here in nine seconds! (He bolts for the front door. A pizza delivery person is walking up to the house, pizza in hand and is a split-second away from ringing the doorbell, when Garfield reaches from the pet door and steals the pizza from the delivery boy's hand, much to his surprise. Garfield quickly devours the pizza pie and shoves the pizza box through the pet door and into his mouth)
Delivery Boy: Huh?
(Garfield then rapidly returns to his chair as if nothing had happens just as Jon walks back in from the kitchen)
Jon: Garfield, I'm so impressed with how well you're taking this! I guess I owe you an apology. Keep eating like that, Garfield, and you'll lose that 10 pounds in no time! Eh, you need a napkin? I'll go get one.
Garfield: Just in time! A Chinese restaurant will be delivering in 11 seconds! (He laughs, and runs for the door)
(Later, at Liz's vet's office...)
Liz: No, he hasn't LOST any weight since out last visit. In fact, he's GAINED three more pounds!
Jon: That's not possible! I've had him on a strict diet! (As Jon talks to Liz, Garfield pulls a chocolate popsicle and an ice cream cone with one scoop of each chocolate and mint. When the humans turn to glance at the fat cat, he quickly hides his sweet treasure)
Garfield: (like nothing happened) Heh.
Liz: Jon, for his own good, you have to stop him from eating so much!
Jon: I can't watch him every minute. I have work to do. (Garfield swipes some more ice cream again before hiding it behind his back)
Garfield: Chuckles
Liz: Well, I may have just the solution.
Jon: Laughs
Liz: An inventor with an overweight pussycat invented this. He calls it the Motorized Meow Monitor. (A robot that looks like a box with arms, legs, and a screen for a head is turned on. The robot also holds a camera this is pointing at the orange cat. Garfield, who was smiling casually throughout this time, starts to scowl)
Jon: Motorized Meow Monitor? How does it work?
Liz: I'll show you. (she presses a key on her computer keyboard, and grabs a collar) This collar locks on. I'll give you a key so you can remove it after Garfield has lost 10 pounds! (she wraps it around Garfield's neck. An angry cat turns his head to look at the device) It contains a tracking device. Wherever Garfield goes, the robot will follow, train its camera on him, and send a signal back to you.
Jon: This is amazing, Liz! I can sit at my own computer at home and keep an eye on Garfield, (Garfield meows angrily) no matter where he goes and what he eats!
Liz: You can borrow it, and I'll give you an extra collar just in case.
Garfield: This is not fair! It's an invasion of privacy! (he pulls out his ice cream for Jon and Liz to see) It's spying! Get me an attorney! Get me an attorney named Murray! You have no right to... huh? (he remembers the ice cream in his hands and chuckles nervously)
Jon: (looking at Liz's computer screen, seeing Garfield with his treats) What's that you have in your hand there, Garfield? What do you have to say for yourself?
Garfield: Uhh... want a lick? (he offers the robot an ice cream cone)
Liz: Laughs
(Back at Jon's office, Jon is working on his computer, Odie is sleeping on the couch, and Garfield is attempting to sneak out the door)
Jon: Going out, Garfield? Well remember, you're still on that diet. You're not to eat anything!
Garfield: Not a crumb will cross these lips. (to the audience) OK, so I'm lying. (he walks outside via the pet door) It's OK to lie if it's an emergency, and me not being able to eat between meals, if that's not an emergency, I don't know what is.
(Garfield walks down the street and notices his favorite restaurant to his left)
Garfield: (Gasps) Vito's savory pizza! I haven't tasted it for, (he counts on his fingers) well, it must be a good six hours, but I will need a disguise... (He laughs and runs into a nearby building. He emerges a second later wearing a fedora and sunglasses) I'll have the outfit back in five minutes or 10 slices, whichever occurs first.
(He walks inside Vito's building, only for an alarm to sound. Garfield pauses, surprised by this)
Vito: Mama mia! It is the Garfield orange alert! Everyone, protect the pizzas! (Vito zips out from behind the counter to the front door, holding a pizza paddle in one hand and a rolling pin in the other. Garfield, now out of the building, screams, but tries to play it cool)
Garfield: Garfield? Where is that handsome cat? Oh where? (Vito takes Garfield's hat off. Now with his cover blown, the fat cat chuckles. Vito glares down at Garfield, who raises and lowers his shades) Oh there he is.
Vito: Garfield! If you don't run, I will call Jon! You gotta promise me that you won't swipe any pizzas!
Garfield: On my honor as the star of a popular cartoon show, I promise. (he holds up his hand as if to make a promise)
Vito: Excellent!
(Later, the alarm sounds and Garfield runs out of the restaurant with a pile of lasagna in his hands. Vito runs after him shouting before stopping a few feet from his door)
Vito: You pasta-piling pussycat!
Garfield: (to the audience) I didn't say anything about lasagna.
Vito: You mozzarella-mooching menace!
Delivery Boy: (from inside the restaurant through the window) He only got eight of 'em.
Vito: Oh, only eight? That's not so bad. Last week, he got 17 and a gallon of spumoni.
(Garfield runs down the street and hides behind a dumpster and is just about to feast on his bounty)
Garfield: Ah, the perfect place to dine on nature's most perfect food. (before he can chow down, the Motorized Meow Monitor approaches, with Jon on the the screen looking angry)
Jon: Garfield, I'm disappointed. (Scowls)
Garfield: So am I. I could only get eight.
Jon: You're supposed to stay on your diet. If you eat those lasagnas...
Garfield: Alright, alright, (a disappointed cat walks back to Vito's, lasagna in hand. The Monitor follows closely behind) I don't need to hear the cheap threat. I know it'll be cheap and I know it's a threat.
(The alarm blares again as Garfield strolls in and places the lasagna in the middle of the floor in the restaurant, much to Vito's shock. As Garfield leaves, Vito blocks his path)
Vito: What are you doing?! My lasagna, what is wrong with it? Suddenly Vito's lasagna... it is not good enough for you.
(Garfield storms out, Vito still shouting behind him)
Vito: What are you doing?! I am in such trouble...
Delivery Boy: (from inside the restaurant through the window) It's just one cat who won't eat it.
Vito: But that cat eats EVERYTHING! If he won't eat it, nobody will eat it. I have to change the recipe!
(Meanwhile, Garfield walks down the street, with the machine still tailing him)
Garfield: There are donuts in the world, and pulled pork sandwiches, and fried shrimp the size of whales, but if Jon sees me eating any of it... (the camera angle changes from Garfield's side to Garfield's front. Garfield tries stepping in front if the robot, blocking it from the audience's view, but the gizmo always steps back into the line of sight) Ah! I just have to make sure he doesn't see me eating. (He suddenly bolts to his right, the bot in pursuit. He turns a corner and hides behind a large truck, panting from exhaustion. He addresses the audience) That's my exercise for the year, and maybe next year, too. (he emerges from behind his cover) But it worked! I don't see that motorized meow monitor anymore! Huh? (he then gets a good look at the truck he hid behind, and it turned out to be an ice cream truck. He pops up in the order window) One of everything! No, uh, make it two! (he hops down to the ground) Imagine Jon thinking a bucket of bolts could... (as he is saying this, the "Triple M" walks up)
Jon: Ahem. (Scowls)
Garfield: (Gasps. He speaks to the ice cream vendor) Uh, keep those on ice for me. (he tries to make a break for it, again. The machine follows)
Jon: Garfield!
(During the chase, Garfield runs between a hog dog vendor and his cart. As the vendor pulls a hot dog from his cart, Garfield pilfers it from his hand, much to the seller's confusion)
Garfield: I'll eat this in here, where he can't see me. (he opens a manhole cover and jumps inside, the lid landing perfectly back in place on the top) Phew! Even if that robot followed me in here, he couldn't shoot video to send back to Jon. It's too dark. (once again, he jinxes it. The robot is right behind him, and it shines a light on him to reveal its presence)
Jon: Ahem...
(Garfield leaps out of the sewer and runs down the street, returning the hot dog to the vendor's hand, once again much to his surprise)
Garfield: (while still running and tugging at the collar) It's no use! I'll never escape that robot! (The camera changes to a banana peel on the sidewalk, right in the middle of Garfield's path. At the last second, Garfield manages to notice and jump over--in slow motion--the banana peel, but crashes into a pile of garbage. As he lies among the trash, he brushes his tummy off, raises his head and looks to his feet) Huh? (he realizes that during the crash, the collar had loosened from his neck and had gotten caught between his toes. He reaches over and grabs it as he gets up) Well, at least this came off. (he walks toward a nearby garbage can) Without it on, the Motorized Meow Monitor won't be able to track me. (he takes off the garbage can lid and is about to dispose of the collar when a thought crosses his mind) Hmm... wait a minute, Jon got an extra one. If I throw this one away, he'll just put the other one on me. Gotta be a way to get him to give this machine up. (A "ding" can be heard, as if he got an idea) And I think I know what it is.
(Back at Jon's house, Jon is talking to Liz over the phone in his office. Odie still lies in the background on the couch sleeping)
Jon: It's working out great, Liz. I can sit here at home, keep an eye on Garfield and make sure he doesn't eat between meals.
(Liz is in her office, taking a thermometer out of a bull's mouth)
Liz: It's for his own good, but I bet he's not a happy cat.
Jon: Not happy at all. Looks like he's wandered down to the waterfront. (Jon starts to get worried)
Garfield: Oh agony! Oh despair! Oh despair and agony! Oh did I mention woe? Oh despair, agony, and woe! Hours without lasagna! Days without pork chow mien and crispy noodles! How could Jon do this to me? (he "sobs" as he walks down the pier)
Jon: He looks pretty upset that I'm denying him his favorite foods.
Liz: You know Garfield. That's just an act to get your sympathy. (she pulls a basketball from the bull's mouth)
Jon: This doesn't look like an act. What's he doing now?
Garfield: Sigh (he walks toward a large boat, approaching the ramp leading inside the ship)
Jon: He's... he's heading out onto the pier. There's an ocean liner there... a BIG one! Liz, it looks like he's taking a last look around, like he's leaving!
Liz: (pulling out a rubber ducky from the bull's mouth) Don't fall for it, Jon.
Jon: Liz, he's getting on the boat! Liz, he's on the ship!! (a sad-looking Garfield stands on the deck and looks out) Garfield is leaving! He's going to some other country!! I've got to stop him!!! (Jon hangs up and runs out the door)
Liz: Jon? Jon?!
(Jon starts his car and speeds away)
Garfield: Oh, I'd better get off before she sails. (he drops the collar on a pink-and-purple beach chair. He chuckles to himself as he slides down the anchor's chain, avoids the machine's line of sight, and hides behind some wooden cargo crates) Jon should be here in about 15 minutes, 10 if he makes all the lights.
(The theme song plays and Jon whimpers as he drives down the road. Once at the pier, he gets out and runs to where the boat was set to take off)
Jon: I've gotta be in time! I've just GOTTA be!
(After Jon left his car, the back door mysteriously opens and closes. Garfield makes himself comfortable in the back seat munching on several sandwiches. Meanwhile, Jon talks to someone on the pier)
Jon: What do you mean it's already sailed? My cat's on board! Get it back!
Shipman: Sorry, that ship's on its way to Tokyo.
Jon: (stammering) T-T-Tokyo?! Well, he always did like salmon teriyaki. (He sighs and walks back to his car. He gets back on the phone with Liz. Garfield, meanwhile, is still snacking on sandwiches) Oh he really did it, Liz. Garfield's gone to Tokyo. I'll probably never see him again. I can't tell you how much I'm going to miss him.
Garfield: Sure ya can! Just try!
Liz: (who is now filing an elephant's nails) Jon, I'm really sorry how all this worked out. If you'd like to cancel our dinner tonight...
Jon: No, no, I... need to get my mind of my little fat furry friend. You know I'd give anything to see him again. (he gets back in the car and fastens his seat belt) I wouldn't make him diet. I'd give him whatever he wanted. (He adjusts his rearview mirror. Garfield makes himself known)
Garfield: How about donuts from Dave's Drive-thru Donut Diner?
Jon: You want donuts, Garfield? Sure. (Jon U-turns out of the area)
(Meanwhile, Liz is trying to pull a tiger into her office by its tail when her phone rings. She answers it, and it's Jon again)
Jon: You know, Liz, if he'd just come back from Tokyo I'd... (the realization finally sets in that Garfield is in the back seat)
Garfield: Snickers
Jon: Garfield!! (He makes a rough stop at a place called Joe's Diner) You didn't go to Tokyo! Scaring me like that, you know what I outta do? I outta... (sigh) get you those donuts. (he exits the car and walks toward the diner)
Garfield: (laughs) And on the way home, we can stop at Vito's for pizza. And at Herb's Taco Emporium...
Jon: Moans
(Later that evening, at Jon's house, Garfield sits on his chair and Jon is dressed in a nice suit ready for his date)
Jon: You seem to have enough food to tide you over while I take Liz to dinner. I'll be back around 10:00.
(Garfield laughs as he pulls out the extra collar that Liz had given Jon. He secretly plants it in Jon's coat pocket and sits back down in his chair)
Jon: OK, see you later! (He leaves)
(Garfield gets up and peeks at the door from behind a wall. Odie bounds in a second later)
Odie: Bark!
Garfield: Hello, pup! Hey, c'mon! We're gonna watch my favorite new show!
(At Vito's...)
Jon: I tried to get him to lose weight, Liz. Honest I did. It's just that... he's Garfield.
Liz: I know. Could I have some more water, Jon?
Jon: Sure. Let me pour it for you, I... (As he grabs a bottle of water, he puts his hand in his food) oops. Let me mop that up. (he drops the bottle, causing it to spill all over Liz)
Liz: Oh! Oh, oh...
Jon: Oh, I'm sorry. (he knocks an empty wine glass, but grabs it before it can fall over. In doing so, he knocks his chair backwards, and when he tries to sit down, he falls on his back) Oh, sorry again!
(The scene changes to the Motorized Meow Monitor, which is hiding in the restaurant. Garfield and Odie are on the screen, enjoying every second of the show Jon is providing)
Jon: (Offscreen) Did you see where my pork chop went?
(Garfield and Odie laugh as they watch from Jon's computer. They then hear a squirting sound)
Liz: (Offscreen) Jon! You got ketchup all over me!
Odie: Laughs
Garfield: Oh, that's great!
Jon: (Offscreen) Well, that's better than last time when I spilled the mustard.
Garfield: (laughing) Oh, I love watching Jon on a date. Where else are you gonna find comedy like that? (The theme song starts playing in the background as he grabs a sandwich from the pile of food sitting next to him) Hey, you hungry, Odie?
Odie: Mm-hmm.
Garfield: Well then, you'd better go get some food!
Odie: Huh?
(Garfield eats the sandwich as Odie pants next to him)
Odie: Mutters, growls
Garfield: Snickers
(The episode ends)
THE END