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"Halt! Officer Odie orders you to stop and help!"
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(The episode opens over a bank. A black van screeches onto the sidewalk in front of it and a robber in a nice suit and mask bursts out the back door. He looks around and enters the bank. Flying above the city is the famous superhero Ultra Powerful Guy. He looks down just in time to see the robber fleeing the scene with bags of money. The superhero divebombs to confront the criminal as the latter puts his loot in the van)
Ultra Powerful Guy: So, you think you can rob a bank and get away with it? (He points at the thief and grabs his neck) When will you criminals learn that you are no match for Ultra Powerful Guy?
Bank Robber: Whimpers (Ultra Powerful Guy effortlessly tosses him into the sky, like he was a ball of paper rather than a human) Whoa!
(It is then revealed that the entire scene was just a TV show. Garfield sits in his chair eating chips and Nermal sits on the right arm of the chair)
Ultra Powerful Guy: Once again, I have saved the day and brought justice to the world!
Garfield: (with his paw in the bag) Boy, Ultra Powerful Guy sure has a high opinion of himself. (Nermal licks his lips as Garfield eats another chip)
Nermal: Garfield, could I have a potato chip? (He should try asking for $10,000,000. Better odds of getting that from Garfield than food. Anyways, Garfield simply looks at the kitten and gives him a simple, straightforward answer)
Garfield: No. (He eats another chip)
(Later, Garfield heads outside to sit in his lawn chair in the front yard. Nermal follows)
Garfield: But I guess when you are perfect and admired, it’s hard to be humble. (He eats another chip. Nermal tries to swipe the bag from Garfield’s paw, but misses)
Nermal: Strains (The fat cat, while walking toward the chair, eats another chip. After getting part way there, he does something unusual for him)
Garfield: Here, have a potato chip. (He tosses the bag at Nermal, who catches it)
Nermal: Thanks, Garfield! (He gets no response from the Tubby Tabby, who just slowly heads for his chair. The kitten looks inside the bag and notices that it’s completely empty) Moan (He holds the bag upside-down and shakes it out. Why Nermal expected a chip I do not know. Regardless, he angrily storms toward Garfield) Hey! Well, I don't need your snacks! I’m so CUTE I could get it on my own!
Garfield: This I gotta see. (Nermal then walks to the sidewalk and sits down)
Nermal: Meow. (He gets big kitten eyes and holds his paws together. A blue car brakes suddenly and reverses on the street in front of him)
Man #1: Are my eyes deceiving me (He rubs his eyes) or…is that the cutest kitty I ever saw? (Nermal blinks)
Woman #1: He’s so adorable! Here, let’s give him an ENTIRE pepperoni pizza with mushrooms and Canadian bacon! (She hands a box of pizza to Nermal. Garfield, who had been watching from his chair, leans forward in surprise. This shouldn’t be anything new to him, as Nermal has done this before in past episodes of Garfield and Friends)
Garfield: Gasp! (He gets up and runs for the pizza) Pants
Nermal: Sorry, Garf. (He smacks his lips) I don’t have a SLICE to share. (He closes the lid, takes the box, and leaves. Garfield shakes his head, not enjoying the taste of his own medicine very well. He reaches toward the kitten, but doesn’t try to catch up)
Garfield: (frustratedly) If Ultra Powerful Guy came by, I bet you’d have a slice for him! (He turns around and faces the audience) Idea happening. (He walks inside, using the door and not the pet door. He runs into Jon’s bedroom and digs around in the drawer) Pants Where’s that long underwear of Jon’s? (He tosses some socks, a shirt, pants, and blinders away before finding a turquoise blue pair of underwear) Sigh. Now I'm gonna need a towel and some boots. (He leaves the bedroom and slides down the banister into the camera) Laughs (In the living room, he snips the underwear with a pair of scissors) Laughs (To the viewers) Didn’t know it was this handy, did ya? (He stretches the now shorts and speeds off to finish his plan)
(Meanwhile, Jon heads out the back door to feed Odie)
Jon: Here you go, boy! (He sets Odie’s bowl down before him) A nice dish of sardines.
Odie: Sniffs Bark! (His tail wags happily and he slurps up the sardines. Jon heads back inside, and a costumed figure lands in the backyard, catching the pup by surprise) Howl!
Garfield: Beware, evildoers! (He is dressed like Ultra Powerful Guy. He points at Odie) You thought you could get away with your evil-doing, but you failed to reckon with the awesome might of… (He spins in place and strikes a heroic pose) Ultra Powerful Guy!
Odie: Wow! (Like most of Garfield’s tricks, Odie falls for this rather easily)
Garfield: (while pacing in circles in the yard) Citizen, have you seen any evildoers around here?
Odie: Uh-uh. (He shakes his head no)
Garfield: I’m searching for the villain known as Dr. Drastic! (He stops in front of the gullible pooch and points in the air) He’s a master of disguise, and I have reason to believe he’s made himself to look like this! (He shows Odie a picture of Jon)
Odie: Gasp!
Garfield: (while holding up his paw) But don’t be afraid! He’s only dangerous when he spreads around his disastrous omega-3 explosive devices which he makes to look like harmless but delicious sardines.
Odie: Mutters (He looks down at his bowl. Seeing the sardines, he trembles in fear. Even more worrisome is that he already ate some of them, but he seems to have forgotten that) Whimpers
Garfield: Great Scott! (He points at the contents of Odie’s bowl) That diabolical villain! Fear not, citizen! Ultra Powerful Guy is on the job! (He points at Odie) I shall dispose of these dangerous items. (He eats the fish) Up and away! (He takes off running out of the yard)
Odie: Right! Sigh. (He hangs his head sadly)
Jon: Hi, boy! (Odie looks up at him) How were those sardines?
Odie: (aggressively) Grr!
Jon: Odie, what’s wrong? (The pup steps toward his master) Odie, stop! (Odie chases Jon)
Odie: Bark! Bark!
Jon: It’s me, Jon! JON!
Odie: Bark! Bark! Bark! (No clue as to how that turned out)
(Meanwhile, in the big city, Garfield sits on a bench licking his paws after a meal)
Garfield: Smacking lips Mm! Oh gosh, I wish I had a napkin. Gasp! Oh wait! (He remembers his cape) I always wondered why superheroes needed capes. (He wipes his gloved paws off on his cape) Now I know. (He spots someone, or something, in front of him that makes his eyes grow wide) Gasp! (Nermal walks up, gazing at a poster of Ultra Powerful Guy on the theater. He turns toward Garfield, who quickly hides himself behind the bench and peeks over it. The kitten passes without noticing the Flabby Tabby)
Nermal: I wonder if there are any cat shows I could enter today and of course, win. (Garfield puts his paws on the bench and looks over to Nermal, who walks into a phone booth and stands on the stool inside it. This gives him an idea)
Garfield: (while facing the viewers) Chuckle
Nermal: (while scanning the phone book) Let’s see… “calculators, caterers, caterpillars…” (while Nermal’s distracted, Garfield sneaks up behind him)
Garfield: Snickers (He zips off to start another plan)
Nermal: (continuing) Ah, here we go! “Cat shows”! (Outside, Garfield grabs a broom that was resting on the side of the phone booth, spins it, and props it up against the door, jamming it and trapping Nermal)
Garfield: Chuckles (He leaves, preparing his grand entrance)
Nermal: (looking at a pocketwatch) 2:00. I’ll win it (He puts his watch behind his back) and be home by 3:00! (He gets off the stool and tries to open the door, only to find out that it won’t budge) Hey, hey it’s stuck! Hey! I’m trapped in this phone booth! (He pounds on the glass) Help! I’m stuck in this phone booth! HELP! (On top of the phone booth, Garfield triumphantly stands)
Garfield: This looks like a job for…Ultra Powerful Guy! (He points to the sky) Here I come to save the day! (Rather unimpressively, he tries to climb down the booth. He doesn’t get very far before leaping off it, knocking the broom away and crashing to the ground) Ouch! (Now free, Nermal greets his hero, who is lying flat on his stomach)
Nermal: You saved me! Who are you?
Garfield: Whimpers (weakly) Don’t you recognize me? (The broom clocks him in the head. He rubs it and slowly gets up) I thought everyone knew Ultra Powerful Guy.
Nermal: Wha-? (He doesn't seem convinced)
Garfield: I fly! (He steps toward Nermal and waves his paws, like a bird) I leap over tall buildings in a single bound! (He strikes another pose) I eat! Which reminds me, (he holds up one finger) all this superhero-ing stuff (He puts a paw on Nermal’s back) has made me work up an appetite. Could you show your appreciation by, uh… (He whispers incoherently in Nermal’s ear. The kitten is all too happy to fulfill Garfield’s request)
Nermal: Sure! It’s the least I could do for Ultra Powerful Guy! (Garfield gives him a nod and he runs off toward the street)
Garfield: (facing the audience) Chuckles (Nermal sits on the sidewalk and does his cute kitten routine, big eyes and all that)
Nermal: Meow. (A car stops on the street in front of him) Meow. (The driver speaks to him)
Man 2: What a cute cat! Here, take this plate of spaghetti and meatballs! (Nermal gets up, takes the plate from the man, and delivers it to Garfield, who is now sitting on a bench with his hands on his stomach, dangling his feet)
Nermal: Here you go, U.P.G.!
Garfield: Thanks. (Nermal sets the plate next to him. He leans toward it and wiggles his fingers) Laughs (He notices Nermal and glares at him)
Nermal: Purr
Garfield: Do you mind? I’m trying to eat here.
Nermal: Oh, sorry! See ya later, (He waves good-bye) superhero! (He leaves)
Garfield: Laughs (He takes one strand of spaghetti and uses it to slurp up the rest) Slurps Sigh! (He throws the plate away) Burp (He then addresses the audience) Now that’s how you eat spaghetti, kids. (He shakes his finger) None of this “twirling on a fork” jazz. (He points at the camera) You know what kind of dessert goes after spaghetti? (He gets off the bench and strikes a pose like he was running) ANY kind of dessert! (He takes off down the street in Nermal’s direction. He holds his arms straight behind him as he runs)
(Elsewhere, on a hill in the city, Nermal crosses paths with the real Ultra Powerful Guy. However, the hero is in plain business clothes so the kitten doesn’t recognize him)
Ultra Powerful Guy: My, what an incredibly cute cat! Say, incredibly cute cat, have you seen two men around here? (He pauses to look around, and then holds his hand up to his mouth like he’s giving out secret information) They’re wanted criminals.
Nermal: Sorry. Haven’t seen anyone. (He puts his paw up at Ultra Powerful Guy and continues on his way)
(At the top of the hill, Garfield stands with a dumpster on wheels next to him.
Garfield: Ah, this is great! (He rubs his paws together) I’ll rescue Nermal again, and have his cute magic reward me with a couple of pies! (He sets up the dumpster at the top of the hill) Grunts, strains (He grabs the handle and shoves it down) Here we GO! Hey, hey, slow down! (He jumps on top of the garbage bin) I have to get to him before you! (He rolls down the hill, passing Ultra Powerful Guy and approaching Nermal) Whimpers (The kitten turns around and sees the impending danger) Citizen, look out!
Nermal: YAAAAAHHH! (He leaps out of the way just in time. He watches Garfield ride it)
Garfield: I’ll protect you from that runaway dumpster! (The front wheel hits a rock and Garfield is left clinging to the front face of the dumpster) Whoaaaaa! Ow! Hoo! Ouch! Hoo! (He swerves left and right, avoiding a few people in the process) Stop this thing! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!
(In a junkyard, two criminals, Moe and Joe, discuss their master plan)
Moe: I’m telling you, Joe, (he points at his partner) this is the time to rob that bank!
Joe: And I’m telling YOU, (he points back) Moe, not with Ultra Powerful Guy around. That guy’s too…he’s too…
Moe: Ultra Powerful?
Joe: That’s the word! He can do anything! (At that moment, the Garfield and the dumpster roll up. The fat cat swerves into the yard)
Garfield: YEEEEEEEE-AAAAAAAAAAA!
Moe: Anything except stop a runaway trash dumpster.
Joe: Apparently.
Garfield: No! No! HELP! (The dumpster stops when it hits a trash can in front of the two thieves. The Flabby Tabby is flung into the air) Whoaaaaa! (He lands inside the dumpster, the lid closing behind him)
Moe: That didn’t look very ultra powerful to ME.
Joe: Me neither. (Garfield pops out of the dumpster and addresses the audience)
Garfield: I’ll bet Batman doesn’t get banana peels in his mask. (He grabs a banana peel from his face and discards it. He then takes his mask off in front of Moe and Joe)
Joe: Hey Moe, you see that?
Moe: I see, I see. Ultra Powerful Guy without his mask. (Garfield looks up at them)
Garfield: Chuckles
Moe: (continuing) He’s a…he’s a…
Joe and Moe: Cat!
Joe: Kind of a fat one, too. (The Tubby Tabby starts climbing out of the dumpster)
Garfield: Gotta hurry! I have dessert coming. (He jumps down)
Moe: Snickers Just think, we know Ultra Powerful Guy’s secret identity. (He clenches his fist)
Joe: (pointing) And we know his weakness! He is a cat!
Moe: Let us go rob ourselves a bank. (He heads off. Joe follows)
Joe: Let us.
(Later, Garfield has caught up with Nermal after the former’s wild ride and demands dessert)
Garfield: It’s real simple: (A closer shot shows Garfield has his arms crossed) I saved your life, I get a reward.
Nermal: Aren’t superheroes supposed to fight for truth and justice?
Garfield: Yeah, we do all that stuff, (He steps in a semicircle next to the kitten) but sometimes we also need pie. Now get on with it, banana cream with some chocolate sprinkles.
Nermal: All right. I’ll put on my best banana cream pie with some chocolate sprinkles cuteness. (He sits down on the sidewalk next to the street and does his cute kitty tactic) Ahem. (His pupils get big and he blinks twice) Mew. (A pink car stops on the street in front of him) Purr
Woman 2: My goodness, I've never seen a cuter cat in all my life! Here’s a chocolate cream pie with banana sprinkles!
Nermal: Laughs (He gets up to take the pie, but Garfield intercepts it)
Garfield: Sigh. Close enough.
Nermal: (angrily) Oooooooh! (He puts his hands on his hips and glares at the fat feline as the car leaves) Wow, you’re kind of a disappointment, Ultra Powerful Guy.
Garfield: Not now! I have a pie! (He chomps down on it again)
Nermal: Moan. (He turns around and leaves) Gee, (He rounds the corner of a building) Ultra Powerful Guy wasn’t that impressive. I wish I could've seen him do something REALLY ultra powerful! (He looks up and sees something startling) Huh? (He sees Moe and Joe entering the bank to rob it) Oh no! A bank robbery! (Moe looks around a second before following his partner. Nermal hides behind a tree) What do I do? What do I do? I know! (He holds a finger up) This looks like a job for…Ultra Powerful Guy! Hey! (He leaps forward to get the supposed superhero)
(Not long after, Nermal literally shoves what he thinks is Ultra Powerful Guy–that is, Garfield–onto the scene. The portly pussycat digs his heels into the ground and protests, obviously not cut out for this)
Garfield: But I keep telling you, I don’t do bank robbers! You know what I'm good at. Get me another pie! (He holds up a finger and smiles)
Nermal: You’re a superhero! (Garfield, realizing Nermal has believed his ploy a bit too much, rolls his eyes and gets a frustrated look) It’s your duty to foil those nasty bank robbers! (The cats arrive at the bank just as Joe and Moe are bursting out the door, bags of money in their hands)
Garfield: (stammering) I-I-I don’t suppose you guys would stop in the name of the law?
Joe: It’s Ultra Powerful Guy.
Moe: Snicker We ain’t afraid of Ultra Powerful Guy. (Joe stands next to his accomplice)
Joe: ‘Cause we know his secret, and that we can defeat him with…
Joe and Moe: This! (Moe holds up a catnip mouse that looks more like a rabbit)
Garfield: What is that? (Moe drops it onto the ground)
Moe: You don’t know what it is? It’s a catnip mouse. (Nermal runs up and plays with it, laughing)
Joe: Which is every cat’s weakness.
Garfield: Doesn’t do anything for me. (It is working on Nermal. He laughs, hugs it and holds it up to his face as little hearts pop up all around his head) Maybe if you had one stuffed with lasagna. (The robbers look at each other)
Moe: It ain’t working.
Joe: Eh, let’s get outta here with the loot! (They prepare to put the money in the back of the van. Nermal drops on his back giggling as he plays with the mouse)
Nermal: Laughs (Garfield looks at the kitten and puts his hand behind his head as the thieves toss the bags of money into the truck)
(Nearby, the real Ultra Powerful Guy, still in his casual business attire, notices the criminals as he walks by a subway entrance)
Ultra Powerful Guy: Great Scott! This looks like a job for… (He runs down the subway stairs and returns in his superhero outfit flying through the air) Ultra Powerful Guy! (He poses in front of the sun)
(Meanwhile, the robbers have the money. Joe closes the back of the van and runs into the driver’s seat to make his escape)
Garfield: Huh? Hey, you closed the door on my cape. (The van takes off, with Garfield being dragged along for the ride. Perhaps he should follow the famous phrase from a Pixar movie: “No capes!”) Yelp! Help! (He runs alongside the van) Ow! Ooh! Ouch! Hoo! Hoo! WHAAAA! YAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! (Ultra Powerful Guy flies above the van while Garfield tries to get the villains’ attention) Stop! Cape caught! Yoo-hoo! Whoa! Help! Help! Mayday! (He hops on the edge of the van before falling and sprinting along with it) Stop, please! (He takes a moment to address the audience) Never once happened to Batman, trust me. (Behind them, Ultra Powerful Guy descends, weaving his way around traffic to catch up to the van) Stop the car! Save a cat! (The superhero closes in as the fat cat clings to the driver door handle) YAAA-HA-HA! (Ultra Powerful Guy flies in front of the van and grabs the front with his superhuman strength, stopping it in its tracks)
Ultra Powerful Guy: End of the road for you three! (He picks up the van and carries it upside-down. This loosens Garfield from his predicament and he gets flung onto the bottom side of the van)
Garfield: HEEEEEEEELP! (He leans over the edge and pleads his case) Two! There are two of them, honest! I’m just sort of, uh, a tagalong, (He holds a finger up) or pull-along! I don’t count! (He looks to see where they are headed) Wha-? (He sits down on the van) AAAAHHHHHHHHH! (Ultra Powerful Guy tosses the van and the criminals on the street. Garfield is again sent flying but is caught by the vigilante and carried to the ground. As for Moe and Joe, they are quickly surrounded by police officers)
Ultra Powerful Guy: (while still holding the Tubby Tabby) Nice work, cat. (Everyone cheers and applauds. They watch as Moe and Joe are forced into the back of a police car) If you hadn’t delayed them, I never would’ve caught them! (He extends his hand to shake Garfield’s paw. Before he can, Nermal zips up and high-fives the hero)
Nermal: That was awesome, Ultra Powerful Guy! (He steps back) You were just amazing and… (He notices Garfield next to him) hey, which one of you (He points at both of them) is Ultra Powerful Guy? (Garfield runs and stands next to the hero as the latter kneels)
Garfield and Ultra Powerful Guy: I am. (They both point at themselves)
Nermal: Aw, come on. Tell me, which one of you is Ultra Powerful Guy?
Garfield and Ultra Powerful Guy: I am. (The Flabby Tabby points at himself)
Nermal: (slightly aggravated) Guys, this is not fair! (He points at them) One of you is the real Ultra Powerful Guy, which is it?!
Garfield and Ultra Powerful Guy: I am. (They both roll their eyes, seemingly fed up with the nagging kitten. They then turn to Nermal with evil grins on their faces)
Garfield: Chuckles
(Later, the real Ultra Powerful Guy leaves Nermal stranded on the moon. Garfield rides on the hero’s back)
Nermal: C’mon, OK, which one of you is the real Ultra Powerful Guy? (He should not be able to talk or be heard–or breathe for that matter since he’s on the moon–but cartoon logic)
Garfield and Ultra Powerful Guy: (over their shoulders) I am.
Nermal: (offscreen) Ugh! This is impossible! Alright guys, last time, which one of you, (The hero and cat fly toward Earth) real U.P.G.? Hit me!
Garfield and Ultra Powerful Guy: I am. (As they fly in the direction of the United States, the curtain closes on this episode)
THE END