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Transcript

(slow instrumental music)

Garfield: (clears throat) A poem. By Garfield the Cat.

(rapping instrumental music)

[Garfield]

I decided late one Sunday

I would sleep till half past Monday.

Suddenly, I felt a tap,

Which awoke me from my nap.

I awoke and found before me

Someone who was sure to bore me.

"Please leave me to sleep," I chirped.

That was when the creature slurped!

Just then, the surprise was sprung:

Seven yards of doggie tongue.

Doggie tongues'll always trick ya;

Look so harmless 'til they lick ya.

Odie: (panting and barking

[Garfield]

He let out a loving howl;

I went out to get a towel.

When a dog's enthusiastic,

What you want to do is drastic.

All my fur was wringing wet.

Should've had it washed and set.

Odie: (whimpering)

[Garfield]

"Let me sleep!" I'd often told him.

Looked like I would have to scold him.

I was in for a surprise

When I looked into his eyes;

Pleading, as they were, for mercy

Left me with a controversy.

Then I got a wondrous notion

How to sleep without commotion.

So he'd leave this cat alone,

I dug out his favorite bone.

Odie: (barking happily)

(rapping instrumental music continues)

[Garfield]

Figured if I couldn't cure him,

Next best thing would be to lure him.

Odie: (barking to the beat)

[Garfield]

When he came back, he would find

I had locked the door behind.

Now at least his dripping yap

Wouldn't interrupt my nap.

Odie: Hmm? (whining to the beat)

[Garfield]

In my world, there's no excusing

When you interrupt my snoozing.

So while I was busy snoring,

My friend Odie went exploring.

Usually, he doesn't roam

Quite this far away from home,

But he wandered to an alley

Where the tough dogs often dally.

You would be a little nuts

To go near these mangy mutts.

Odie never comprehends.

He decided to make friends.

When they saw this shy intruder,

They could scarcely have been ruder.

(tough dogs laughing)

[Garfield]

Odie's thoughts are always sunny.

What, he wondered, was so funny?

"This," one said, "is not a dog.

Maybe this is someone's frog!"

"It's no frog," the other said.

"It's a rat that ain't been fed!"

(tough dogs laughing)

[Garfield]

"Nah," the biggest one exclaimed.

"I know what this runt is named.

Not a frog and not a rat;

This is just a teensy gnat!"

And he grabbed poor Odie's bone

And he claimed it for his own.

Odie, you must understand,

Always wants to lend a hand.

Anytime or anywhere,

Odie would be glad to share.

But you have to do it right.

Taking things is not polite.

Odie wanted it returned.

His request was promptly spurned.

(tough dogs laughing)

[Garfield]

Odie wound up wet and soggin'

With a frog upon his noggin.

(frog croaks)

[Garfield]

He made sure the frog was thrown back.

Now he'd go to get his bone back.

But before our friend returned,

One of them seemed most concerned.

She said she was not amused

At the way he'd been abused.

"Butch," she said, "you're very tough!

Did you have to be so rough?"

Just then, Odie reappeared.

The bulldog gave a laugh and sneered.

Picked up Odie very crass;

Threw him for a forward pass.

Odie: (whimpering)

[Garfield]

Now the other dog agreed

That was not a funny deed,

And she told the bulldog he

Really should let Odie be.

Butch said that he wasn't done.

Pounding Odie's too much fun.

That was when he looked and found

That his ladies weren't around.

They decided they would flee with

Someone much more nice to be with.

They led Odie to a world

Where he'd not be kicked or hurled.

Butch was left there all alone

With no friends, just Odie's bone.

So they marched the little waif

To the home where he'd be safe.

Odie had made lifelong pals

With a couple doggie gals.

Someone had not figured fully;

People never love a bully.

So our tale is adjourned

With this lesson to be learned:

Helpless folks you shouldn't flog;

People love an underdog

Garfield: The end.

(window shade shoots up with Garfield)

Garfield: And that's a wrap.

(episode ends)

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