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"Halt! Officer Odie orders you to stop and help!"
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(The episode begins one day above Jon’s neighborhood. The ice cream truck turns onto Jon’s street playing its soft song. A little girl and presumably her grandmother approach. Behind them, Garfield is in the distance, spying from a tree, gripping a vine, and wearing a leopard-print cloth like Tarzan)
Garfield: Laughs Here it comes! Boy what I won't do for ice cream. (He yells so loud he shakes the camera) Tarzan yell (He beats his chest like Tarzan, but unlike him, he loses his breath) Cough! Wheeze! Cough! Cough! Gasp! Oh! Here it goes! (Before he can swing into action, Squeak slides down a different vine)
Squeak: Chuckles Don’t waste your time, Garf.
Garfield: (turning to him) Squeak! How’d you know I was up here?
Squeak: I know all, I see all, (He points at the truck) and I see that the ice cream truck will hit a pothole in the street (He swings his arm) and a case of chocolate Num-Num bars with almonds will pop out. (Garfield looks at the truck. Sure enough, it hits a pothole and a case falls out of the back onto the sidewalk. The Flabby Tabby peers at the box and walks over to it, along with Squeak)
Garfield: (reading) “Chocolate Num-Num bars with almonds”. (He picks it up)
Squeak: Told ya. (He points at his friend) I have developed a power (He crosses his arms) to see into the future. (He starts to leave)
Garfield: Chuckle
Squeak: By the way, the garbage truck is about to come by, and when it hits the same pothole, (He points at the pothole. Garfield looks at it) you’ll be covered by 30 pounds of rotten mackerel! (He leaves. Garfield simply turns to the viewers, shrugs, and heads up the sidewalk, when a garbage truck comes, hits the pothole, and dumps a pile of fish skeletons all over Garfield, just as Squeak said)
Garfield: (to the viewers) You know I always like a little smelly fish with my chocolate Num-Num bars.
(Later that day, Garfield has finished cleaning himself off. He wears a towel on his head and around his waist, licking one of his prized ice cream bars)
Garfield: Lick! Mm! Nom-nom-nom. OK, (He gets a determined look and holds his finger up as he addresses the audience) now that I'm defished, Lick! I need to find out how Squeak did that. Lick! (He takes off and instantly appears in front of Squeak’s mousehole, without the towels he had previously. Squeak is sitting outside his hole reading a newspaper called The Wide Ear, with a front page headline reading, “Another deal with orange cat!” The Tubby Tabby raises his finger, but before he can begin, the rodent cuts him off)
Squeak: You wanna know how I know what’s going to happen before it happens. (Cut to Squeak) Jon’s doing chores. He’s about to hit his thumb with a hammer. (Garfield is now on all fours under the table. Just then, the sound of a hammer pounding is heard in the next room)
Garfield: How could you POSSIBLY know… (Sure enough, Squeak’s prophecy comes true)
Jon: OOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW!
Garfield: Oh! (He is visibly shocked)
Jon: That hurts! OOOOOOOWWWWWWWW!
Garfield: Gasp!
Squeak: (raising his finger) I’ll hide. He’s gonna come in and say, “Oh, I smashed my poor little thumb with that big hammer.” (He retreats into his hole. Once again, he is accurate, and the Flabby Tabby watches as his owner’s thumb throbs)
Jon: Oh, I smashed my poor little thumb with that big hammer. (Squeak reappears)
Squeak: Now he’s gonna trip over Odie.
Jon: Odie! (Garfield turns to see Jon tripping over Odie) Oh, look out! (Jon falls flat on Odie’s back, dazing them both)
Odie: Whimper
Garfield: Grunt! (He peers into the mousehole, looking for answers. Squeak is inside an old shoe, still casually reading the paper)
Squeak: (while raising his finger) And YOU’RE gonna wander off and wonder how I do this. Giggles (He wags his finger at Garfield, who promptly gets up)
Garfield: Ooh! Right again. (Seeing that he can’t get any answers, he leaves. Returning to Squeak…)
Squeak: (to the viewers) You’re wondering, too. Well, I'll let you in (He points at us, the audience) on the secret. I’ve been doing something YOU’VE been doing. That’s right. In fact, you’re doing it right this second! (He gets out of the shoe and races out his door) C’mon! (He springs onto Garfield’s chair and takes a seat right in the middle of it. He presses a button on the remote) I’ve been watching The Garfield Show! (On TV is the opening theme of The Garfield Show) Jon got this new satellite dish with all these new channels, and on one of them, (He holds up one finger) guess what I found! (He presses another button, about as giddy as a kid on Christmas. The opening scene of this exact episode is on, with Garfield in the tree about to steal some ice cream)
Garfield: (on TV) Here it comes! Boy what I won't do for ice cream. Tarzan yell Cough! Wheeze! Cough! Cough! Gasp!
Squeak: Yes!
Garfield: (on TV) Oh! Here it goes!
Squeak: So you see, the reason I know what’s going to happen before it happens is that I've SEEN this cartoon already! Yeah, really! Jon and Garfield, (He raises both paws) they don’t know (He shakes his head) about this terrific channel, and they don’t know I’ve been recording episodes and storing them on the video recorder here! (He points at the recorder, which is underneath the TV) The episode you’re watching, it’s a rerun, and I recorded it three weeks ago! Here, (He hops to his feet) I'll jump ahead! (He fast-forwards to the point in the episode one second behind where he is now, and he sees himself on the TV)
Squeak: (on TV) Here, I'll jump ahead!
Squeak: Hey hey! (He waves)
Squeak: (on TV) Hey hey! (Squeak then sticks his tongue out, and his TV counterpart does the same thing, like a delayed-reaction mirror)
Squeak: Chuckles (He points at the TV) Let’s see what happens in the NEXT scene! (He fast-forwards again, and sees Garfield on all fours talking to him in the kitchen)
Garfield: Squeak, I don’t know how you predict the future, but…
Squeak: I know, I know, you want me to feed you my predictions and you become famous as the cat who can predict the future, (He echos the word, “future”) future, future. Deal. (He winks and extends his paw to shake)
Garfield: Laughs (The two friends shake paws)
Squeak: That’s coming up. I’d better get in there (He points vaguely toward the kitchen) so I can be in that scene! (He disappears)
(In the kitchen, Garfield is circling Odie, trying to figure out how their rodent friend can predict the future so accurately. Odie watches him as he paces)
Odie: Huh?
Garfield: OK, here’s my idea, Odie. (Odie’s neck rotates a full 360 degrees, just like an owl) I give out Squeak’s predictions…
Odie: Ohhhh.
Garfield: (continuing) and I'll become famous as (He holds his finger up) the cat who can predict the future, (He echos the word “future”) future, future! (Odie’s head spins back into its normal direction, dizzying the pup. After a brief moment to get his bearings, he looks at his fat feline friend, nodding and glaring)
Odie: Moan. Mutter (Squeak looks at his wrist, as if wearing a watch. On cue, Garfield arrives asking his wisdom)
Garfield: Squeak! I don't know how you predict the future, but…
Squeak: I know, I know, you want me to feed you my predictions and you become famous as the cat who can predict the future (He echos the word, “future”) future, future. Deal. (He winks and extends his paw to shake, just as Squeak saw moments earlier)
Garfield: Laughs (They shake paws and Garfield runs over to his canine companion) C’mon, Odie! Let’s get to work.
Odie: (nodding) Uh-huh! (Both pets race out of the kitchen)
Squeak: Now here comes the part where I give Garfield predictions and he passes them on to Jon! (He points vaguely over his shoulder with his thumb)
(In the backyard, Jon is standing in shock at a meteorite right next to him. Odie and Garfield are next to him, their tails wagging behind them)
Jon: Garfield, I don't know how you knew that meteor was going to crash down to Earth, (He looks at the fat cat) but you shoved me aside just in time!
Garfield: Snickers (He grins and nods)
Jon: And earlier you guessed who would win that soccer match and even guessed the final score! (A thought hits him) Gasp! Is it possible you’ve become… the cat who can predict the future, (He echoes the word “future”, like Garfield and Squeak did earlier) future, future?
Garfield: Mm. How did I know you were gonna say that? (He glances over his shoulder. Squeak is hiding in his paws behind his back, away from Jon’s view) Chuckle (Garfield winks at Squeak)
(After some time, Garfield has become famous for predicting the future. Several people (including Brent Mogul) gather around a TV store watching the Anchorwoman give a report about it on the news)
Anchorwoman: The scientific community has been rocked by reports of a cat that can predict the future. In the last seven days, (She holds up her finger) Garfield Cat has predicted the outcome of the American World Series, the outcome of the Indianapolis 500 motor race, and the outcome of the (She points up again) legendary Kentucky Derby. (Cut to above Jon’s house, where the news continues) He also amazingly predicted that those three events, usually held months apart, would all, for some reason, (Cut to inside the house, where Jon Garfield and Odie are watching the news on their TV, Jon in the chair, Garfield on the left arm of the chair, and the panting pup on the floor) take place in the same week! But perhaps the cat’s most impressive forecast… (Jon speaks over her as she says something about the stock exchange)
Jon: You’re famous, Garfield! (The cat and his owner look at each other) I don’t know how you do it. (Cut to inside the newsroom)
Anchorwoman: Tonight, Garfield’s powers will be tested on a special telecast (She holds her finger up) on the TV series, (Odie looks at Garfield. Squeak is hiding between the puppy’s ears. Garfield grins at him and gives him a thumbs-up) Somebody’s Got Talent! If he can indeed predict the future, he will win one million dollars! (All three of them are shocked at this news)
Jon, Garfield, and Odie: Huh?!
Garfield: Gasp! (The realization takes a moment to set in) Laugh (He rubs his paws together greedily) Longing laugh (He grins)
Odie: Right! (He turns around to face his friends, panting and wagging his tail)
Jon: That’s right! We’ll win one million dollars!
Garfield: (holding his finger up) I’LL win one million dollars. (Jon gets up out of the chair)
Jon: I’m going to get ready to go (He points up) down to the station. C’mon, Odie! (He takes off. Odie runs after him)
Odie: Bark! (The Flabby Tabby takes Jon’s place in the chair) Bark, bark, bark, bark! Bark! (Garfield watches them go, and Squeak joins him on the chair. Garfield turns around)
Garfield: Ready to go, Squeak?
Squeak: I’ll meet you down there, Garf. There's something I gotta do first.
Garfield: (while getting off the chair) Suit yourself. (He holds his finger up) Just make sure you’re there to give me their predictions so I’ll pass their test. (He leaves the living room, addressing the audience as he goes) Jon probably thinks I’ll spend the whole million on lasagna. Scoff! That’s silly! (He holds his finger up) I’ll spend half on ravioli.
(Cut to Squeak, who remains on the chair)
Squeak: (to the viewers) Gasp! I realized something! I realized I never watched the end of this episode. (He points down at the chair and presses a button on the remote. The TV shows Jon in a nice suit driving Garfield and Odie down to the TV station, a scene that never did happen outside of this moment)
Jon: Here we go, guys! When we return home, we’ll have a million bucks!
Garfield: I’LL have a million bucks. (He smiles)
Squeak: (while tapping his chin) I need to know what happens in the end so that I’ll know what to tell Garfield is gonna happen. (He presses another button, but instead of showing the end, the TV shows an image of a trash can with a green arrow pointing into it. He accidentally deleted the show from the recorder) WHAT?! (He leaps in surprise) Episode deleted? That can’t be! (His voice slowly becomes more anxious in tone) I-I must’ve accidentally hit the delete button! It’s gone! What am I gonna do (He hops off the chair and paces circles on the floor) if I can't watch the end of this episode? Sputters (An idea comes to him) I know! This episode is on right now! It is! You’re watching it, right? Well, then I can watch it! (He hops back onto the chair) I just need to turn to the channel. (He presses a button on the remote a few times, scrolling through advertisements and other shows until pressing a red button on the remote and finding the required channel, where an announcer is on)
Announcer: The Garfield Show will not be seen (The rodent leans forward in surprise) so we can bring you tonight’s (He holds his finger up) special edition of Somebody’s Got Talent!
Squeak: Oh no! (He grabs his face and shakes his head, horrified) We’ve been preempted! The show’s not on! (He turns to the viewers for help) Quick! Call the station and complain! (With no other options, Squeak bursts out the front pet door, up the sidewalk, and to his left, running as fast as his little legs can carry him, toward the TV station) Whimpers Garfield’s gonna be so mad! And right now, that’s the only thing I CAN predict!
(Later that night, a helicopter flies around the TV station. Inside is the airing of Somebody's Got Talent)
Announcer: And now, the host of Somebody's Got Talent, (Cut to inside, and the stage where the talent competition is being held) Dr. Whipple!
Dr. Whipple: Ah, good evening! (He waves to the studio audience) As usual, I'm joined tonight by the lovely actress, Kate Turkeybaster! (He gestures to her. A buzzer sounds)
Kate Turkeybaster: I vote no! (A red X is is on the screen below her podium)
Dr. Whipple: Not yet! Wait until there’s an act on stage! (Cut back to Whipple) And also with us is the famous food critic Eddie Gourmand! (He gestures to the second judge, Eddie)
Eddie Gourmand: Hello, world! (He waves at the TV viewers and then points to them) That’s right, I'm talking to each and every one of you!
(Backstage, Jon peers at the stage)
Jon: Ready to go on, Garfield? (The Tubby Tabby, who is wearing a black bowtie, is pacing in circles nervously. Odie quietly watches behind him)
Garfield: (nervously) No! Where’s my mouse?
(Back onstage…)
Dr. Whipple: Tonight our first contestant is a local cat who claims to be able to predict the future. (A buzzer sounds)
Kate Turkeybaster: I vote yes!
Studio Audience: Gasp!
Dr. Whipple: Not yet! We’ve arranged for a special test, which of course he will fail, because it’s impossible to predict the future.
Eddie Gourmand: I just knew you’d say that!
Kate Turkeybaster: I vote no. (Dr. Whipple seems to have had enough of the judges)
Dr. Whipple: You stay out of this.
Eddie Gourmand: I have every right to say what I want to say! (He, Kate, and Whipple start arguing over each other)
(Outside, Squeak has managed to reach the TV building)
Squeak: Pant Gotta get there! Pants Oh! Pant Oh no!
(The show continues. Garfield stands on a podium. In front of him is a panel with 52 buttons on it, each one depicting one of the 52 cards in a standard deck, Ace to King from left to right, Hearts, Clubs, Diamonds, and Spades from top to bottom. Dr. Whipple stands on the other side of the panel explaining the rules)
Dr. Whipple: Garfield will be asked to predict which of 52 (He holds up his hand, and then two fingers) playing cards I will draw from the deck. If he’s right, he will win one million dollars!
Studio Audience: Ooooooh! (Garfield looks at the TV audience)
Garfield: Snickers (He grins nervously)
Dr. Whipple: And just to make things interesting, if Garfield is wrong, his owner, Mr. Arbuckle, (He gestures to Jon, who is seated over a vat filled with cheese, resembling a dunk tank) will be dropped into this vat (Jon waves at the viewers, very confident that Garfield will pull through for him) containing 10 tons of rancid cottage cheese!
Studio Audience: (amazed and looking at the sight) Ahhhhhh!
Eddie Gourmand: (pointing up) I voted for soft frozen yogurt! (He makes the OK symbol with his hand)
Kate Turkeybaster: Oooh! (She claps her hands together) I LOVE soft frozen yogurt!
Dr. Whipple: Alright, Garfield, for one (He holds one finger up) million dollars, what card did I pick? (He takes the top card of the deck and shows it to both judges, Eddie first and then Kate)
Eddie Gourmand: Chuckle (Garfield is overwhelmed. Without Squeak, he doesn’t know what to do, and he only has a 1.9% chance of guessing correctly. For comparison, rolling Snake Eyes on a pair of six-sided dice is about 3%, so selecting a card correctly is even harder than rolling a 2 on two dice)
Garfield: Moan! Oh boy! (He helplessly looks at the panel in front of him) Squeak, where are you?
Dr. Whipple: You have 15 seconds, Garfield.
Garfield: Squeak, how could you abandon me like this? (A timer counts down with dinging noises) I’m gonna have to just take a wild guess. I’ll pick the Three of Clubs. (He steps over to make his selection, his paw shaking. Odie is offstage, watching nervously)
Odie: Whimpers (Just then, Squeak runs up. Odie, who had been mostly quiet, notices him and greets him) Gasp! Bark! (The pup’s bark gets the cat’s attention)
Garfield: Huh? (He turns and sees Squeak. He grins, thinking he is saved just in time)
Squeak: Uh-oh. (to himself) I’m just gonna have to guess. (He calls out to Garfield) Uhhh, Jack of Diamonds?
Odie: Yeah! Yeah! (He nods and watches the show on stage)
Dr. Whipple: Time’s up, Garfield! What card am I holding? (He taps his fingers on the card)
Garfield: Sigh! (He presses the Jack of Diamonds button, and it shows on the screen behind him)
Dr. Whipple: The Jack of Diamonds? No, I'm sorry, (He shows the card to the judges) it was the Three of Clubs. (Garfield’s initial wild guess was correct. The three clubs on the card are in a triangle shape, rather than a straight line down the middle like a normal deck)
Studio Audience: (sadly) Awwwww! (The chair dumps Jon into the rancid cheese)
Jon: Whoa! Oof!
Garfield: Sigh… (He shakes his head)
Odie and Squeak: Whimper (Both of them shake their heads, too. Jon then pokes his head out from the cheese))
Studio Audience: Cheers and applause
Jon: Oh. Garfield! (He looks at his owner with a worried expression) Scowl!
(Later that night, Jon, Garfield--now without his tie--Odie, and Squeak are headed for their car. Jon is furious, while all three animals are more downtrodden than anything)
Jon: Grrr!
Odie: Whines
Squeak: Sigh…
(Later that night, inside the Arbuckle household, Garfield is sitting straight on his chair, his arms folded across his chest, clearly displeased with his rodent friend. Squeak is on the left armrest next to him)
Squeak: Is Jon mad at you? (The Flabby Tabby glances at him, and then turns away)
Garfield: No, not really. He did say though that the only thing he’s gonna feed me next year is rancid cottage cheese. Hey Squeak, how did you make those accurate predictions?
Squeak: I’ve been watching The Garfield Show. (He points at the TV. Garfield is stunned at this news)
Garfield: What?!
Squeak: The show! (He points again at the TV) It’s on this great channel I found on the TV. Look! (The TV shows the scene from seconds prior. The Tubby Tabby is floored by this discovery)
Garfield: WHA?!
Squeak: (on TV) Is Jon mad at you?
Garfield: You’ve just been watching this episode? (He points at the TV)
Squeak: Hey hey! (Squeak finds it somewhat funny, but Garfield is furious)
Garfield: OHHHH, Squeak, (The mouse gets up) when I get my hands
Squeak: Uh-oh…
Garfield: (continuing) on you! (He swipes at Squeak, who escapes) Meow! (He chases Squeak around the table)
Squeak: Don’t hurt me, Garfield! I’m sorry! (They round the table and enter the hallway, disappearing behind a wall. With that, the episode comes to an end)
THE END