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"Halt! Officer Odie orders you to stop and help!"
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(The episode begins one night outside Jon’s house. An owl flies by and hoots, and the lights are still on inside)
Man on TV: Coming up on Movies ‘til Dawn, (Garfield is inside binge watching the TV and holding the TV guide in his paws) Kung Fu Creatures on the Rampage.
Garfield: Chuckles A classic! (He reads the guide) How that didn’t win best picture I'll never know. (Jon and Odie enter the living room, Jon in his pajamas)
Odie: Mutters
Jon: Yawn! I’m going to bed, Garfield. (He and the pup leave. Garfield returns his focus to the guide)
Odie: Mutters
Jon: (continuing, and raising his finger) Don’t stay up all night watching old movies, OK?
Garfield: Hmm, let’s see what they’re showing after Kung Fu Creatures on the Rampage. (He reads the guide) Gasp! Kung Fu Creatures on the Rampage 2: The Sequel! Oh I have to watch that! (He reads the guide some more) What’s on after that? Gasp! Kung Fu Creatures on the Rampage 3! Oh! (He addresses the audience) I think I notice a pattern beginning to emerge here. (Cut to outside. The full moon rises and then sinks, all while Garfield talks) Kung Fu Creatures on the Rampage 4! That was the one where the kung fu creatures rampaged in Hawaii! And then there’s 5, and then 6… (After the moon sets, the sun rises, and a rooster crows. Garfield had spent the entire night, and even parts of the morning, watching movies)
Man on TV: And that concludes our Movies ‘til Dawn presentation of Kung Fu Creatures on the Rampage 11.
Garfield: (sleepily) You gonna quit now?
Jon: Good morning, Garfield!
Garfield: Huh? (His ears are droopy)
Jon: (raising his finger) I’m going out to run some errands. I may be gone all day! (Garfield hops off the chair)
Garfield: I’m going to bed. (He heads for the hallway, his tired head sagging) I may be gone all year.
Jon: Huh? (He shrugs) Gasp!
Garfield: Sleep… must sleep… (He speaks robotically) nothing must stop me from sleeping… (Odie runs up to him, a stick in his mouth, and abruptly stops) Huh?
Odie: Mutters Pants (He wags his tail)
Garfield: Especially this. (He points at the panting pup) You want me to throw the stick so you can fetch it, boy?
Odie: Bark! Mutter Bark! Mutters (The Flabby Tabby considers it, and then agrees, if only to remove a distraction from the house)
Garfield: (monotone) Alright, I'll throw the stick so you can fetch it, boy. (He takes the stick and trudges over to the open window. Odie speeds up to him)
Odie: Bark! Pants (Despite his drained battery, Garfield tosses the stick through the window)
Garfield: Grunt! (The stick sails into the car. Odie watches from the windowsill)
Odie: Pants (He disappears from the window and runs outside to get the stick) Bark! Bark, bark! (He clambers into the car)
(Jon, meanwhile, is just leaving to run those errands)
Jon: Hums (He heads for his car when Odie pops his head up)
Odie: Huh?
Jon: Odie! You were hiding (Odie sticks his head out of the open car window) in the backseat? You wanna come with me on my errands and keep me company? (A ride in the car? Odie enthusiastically accepts)
Odie: Bark! Bark! Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark!
Jon: OK. (He points at the pup) Put on your seatbelt! (Odie takes a seat and Jon gets in)
Odie: Bark! Bark! (Garfield pulls himself into the window)
Garfield: Grunt. (He watches Jon and Odie leave with tired eyes) Laughs (He hops down from the window) There. One less thing to keep me from sleeping all day. (Squeak suddenly skids to a halt in front of Garfield) Gasp!
Squeak: Hey! (He waves at the Tubby Tabby)
Garfield: Hi, Squeak. Don’t talk to me. (He heads for the stairs and raises his finger) I have to go to bed.
Squeak: I won’t bother you, Garfield. (Garfield stops and looks at Squeak) None of the mice will. We’re all going out for a BIG hike! (He points vaguely toward the backyard) They’re gathering out in the yard right now.
Garfield: Ohhh… (He slowly follows Squeak into the yard)
(Outside, the mischief has gathered in the yard and are talking amongst themselves)
Mice: Overlapping chatter (As they chat, a dumpster-dwelling cat named Bruno peeks over the fence at them)
Bruno: Mmmm! I think I'll help myself to the mouse (He taps his fingers on the fence) buffet! Cackles (He leaps into the yard, startling all the mice) Hey!
Mice: AAAAHHHHH! (Most of them flee in terror, except for Irv and a fat mouse that resembles Packy from the Season 2 episode Detective Odie)
Irv: Quick, Arlo, (He talks to the fat mouse. His name is Arlo, evidently) the cat alarm! (Arlo races over to a button on the house, going unnoticed by Bruno, who is after a small group of mice. He presses the button, and an electronic voice plays inside, along with sirens and flashing red lights)
Electronic voice: Cat alert. Repeat, cat alert.
Garfield: Huh?
Electronic voice: Cat in yard. (Garfield is too sleepy to be alarmed, but Squeak is horrified for his rodent brethren)
Squeak: The cat alert?! (He raises his finger) C’mon, Garfield! (He takes off)
Garfield: Do I have to?
(Outside, Bruno has all the mice in his paws. Some of them dangle by their tails)
Bruno: Laughs Kick all you want, mice! You’re not getting away! (Squeak zips outside and sees Bruno with the mice)
Squeak: Gasp! (He rushes inside through the pet door and onto the counter. A hose is attached to the sink faucet. He hops over to the tap to turn the water on) Grunt! Strain! (He pulls the tap with all his might, but is unsuccessful in twisting it. Thankfully for the mice, Garfield is there with the assist)
Garfield: Here, (He raises his finger) let me get that.
(Bruno raises a mouse to his mouth)
Bruno: Laughs (Before he can indulge, he is blasted in the face–especially the mouth–with a stream of water from the hose) Spit! (He throws the mice and raises his paws to his head, trying to block the stream) Gargles
Garfield: Laughs (He turns the water off and points at Bruno, who is dripping wet. The mice are gathered in front of him) Leave this yard, and leave those mice alone, Bruno!
Bruno: Grr! (He shakes his fist) I’ll be back! (He raises his finger) Some mealtime soon, I’ll be back! (Defeated, he leaves the yard. The mice celebrate and thank the fat cat)
Mice: Cheer (Some of them hop, but they all cheer)
Garfield: Yawn!
Irv: What can we do to repay you, Garfield?
Garfield: Go leave on your hike so I can get some SLEEP. (He heads inside)
Squeak: You got it! Let’s go, guys!
(The mice then appear on the front sidewalk, marching single file, walking in unison with Squeak keeping tempo, like an army march)
Squeak: Hup, two, three, four! Hup, two, three, four! Step in time, stay together! One, two, three, four! (A voice comes from the side of the house)
Mary Margaret: Oh I hope I’m not too late but I'm probably too late (A small mouse with pink glasses and a blue bow on her head zips out from behind the side of the house. Her name is Mary Margaret) but I hope I'm not too late! (She runs over to the front porch) Uncle Squeak? Uncle Squeak? Uncle Squeak? Anybody who isn’t my Uncle Squeak? (She runs inside)
(On the table, Garfield lies on his back in bed. He wiggles his toes and yawns a big yawn. Finally, no one can bother him)
Garfield: Yawn! At last (He taps his stomach) I can get down to some serious… (He twirls his finger in the air) hmm… (He sits up) I wonder if Kung Fu Creatures on the Rampage 12 is on. (He shakes his head no and lies back down) No, no, I need to sleep, sleep, wonderful delicious sleep. (He closes his eyes and enters dreamland) Snore! I love sleep… Snore! Sleeping is so good. Snore! (He is startled by an unfamiliar voice) Yelp!
Mary Margaret: Do you know where my Uncle Squeak is? (He lifts his head and sees Squeak’s niece on the table with him) Do you know where all the mice went? We were supposed to leave for the hike at 10:00 and it’s now 9:52 and you have a very pretty house here but I prefer the call of age… (As Mary continues, Garfield’s fuse gets shorter and shorter. He grabs his head)
Garfield: Grrrrrrr!
Mary Margaret: What’s your name? My name is Mary Margaret Mouse and Uncle Squeak is my uncle. (Garfield grinds his teeth together, wincing and trembling) You have an uncle? I have six uncles. All of them are mice, but my mom says Uncle Alfred is kind of a rat. I think that’s a joke. Ha ha. Are you a cat? (Garfield glares at the mouse) My mom says to beware of cats because cats are mean and dangerous and they eat mice. (She points at him) If you’re a cat, I shouldn't even be talking to you. So… (She adjusts her glasses) are you a cat? (Garfield rolls over onto his side)
Garfield: No, I'm not a cat. I’m an anteater. Sigh… (He snuggles up to get some shut-eye, but Mary Margaret’s talking startles him)
Mary Margaret: Oh good.
Garfield: (surprised) YAAHHH! (He gets a look on his face and his toes spread apart)
Mary Margaret: I’m glad you’re not a cat. (Clearly the kid does not know sarcasm) Have you ever been to Portugal? Did I mention my name is Mary Margaret Mouse? You’re the first anteater I've ever met. (She is excited by this) I thought I met a penguin once, but it turned out to be a short man in a bad suit.
Garfield: AAAHHHH! (He can’t take much more. When Mary Margaret pauses, he speaks up) May I say one thing? (He holds up his finger)
Mary Margaret: It’s your house. (She points at him) You may say anything you want in your house, Mr. Anteater. (She clasps her paws together) What would you like to say?
Garfield: What I'd like to say is… (He yells) STOP!!! (His shout shakes the house, and everything in it. Mary Margaret blinks, caught completely off-guard) I’m sorry, the mouse hike left a little early. (She turns around) They’ll be back, uh, (Cut back to Garfield) I don’t know, whenever they’re back! (He lies back down) Heh. (He tries sleeping, but the chatterbox mouse appears on his tummy)
Mary Margaret: That’s all right, Mr. Anteater. Could we play games until they get back, Mr. Anteater? I like games. Do you like games?
Garfield: I like to sleep. (He turns his head on its side. Mary Margaret blinks)
Mary Margaret: (raising her finger) I do that too. (Garfield opens one eye and stares at her) Well goodbye, Mr. Anteater. I'm going to go exploring (She hops onto Garfield’s bed and then the table) on my own. (She walks off, pointing upward) If I see any ants you can eat, I'll let you know. (She springs off the table, leaving the tired tabby alone, temporarily)
Garfield: Kind of a talkative little creature, isn’t she? Hope she doesn’t run into Bruno. Yawn! Mutters Smack! That isn’t my problem. (yawning) I have more impor… snore! (He dozes off, but quickly gets a dream. In it, Mary Margaret has been caught by Bruno)
Mary Margaret: Help! Help! The cat has me! Help!
Bruno: Cackles (He bares his claws. Garfield snaps awake)
Garfield: Doh! (He sits up, not wanting the innocent mouse to fall victim to Bruno’s hunger) OK, so it IS my problem.
(Outside, a bluebird floats down to the ground, chirping as it goes. It stops next to a worm and hops over toward it, but Mary Margaret walks up, giving the worm a window to escape, which it does)
Mary Margaret: (pointing) Why are you blue, Mr. Bluebird? Why aren’t you chartreuse or purple or a nice shade of beige? (The bluebird pauses, and then gets a look) Beige is my favorite color. Did you know that the biggest planet in our solar system is Jupiter? (The bird covers its ears, or the sides of its head, not wanting to listen any more) Have you ever been to Portugal? Squeals (The bird is sprinting in the opposite direction. It quickly flies away before the talkative mouse can catch up) Moan… (She hangs her head, but then sees the worm the bird was after) Gasp! Hello, Mr. Worm. (She zips after it) Did you always wanna be a worm? (The worm inches up to her, and is just as quickly wanting to get away as the bird) If you put on a fuzzy jacket, would that make you a caterpillar? (Garfield sleepily steps outside) Have you ever been to Portugal? (Mary Margaret turns around and sees him) Oh hello, Mr. Anteater. Do you know Mr. Worm (She gestures to the worm) here?
Garfield: (raising his finger) OK, well, we’ll play games.
Mary Margaret: Yay!
Garfield: I’m gonna regret this. (He looks to the sky regretfully and shakes his head) I am DEFINITELY gonna regret this. (The worm gets away, leaving the cat and mouse in the yard)
Mary Margaret: What’s it like being an anteater? Do you like your ants raw or cooked? Did I ask you if you’ve ever been to Portugal?
Garfield: Grrr! (His head trembles angrily) Six times. (He holds up six fingers) Hey, save the questions. (He raises his finger) Let’s just play hide-and-seek. I’ll hide, you seek.
Mary Margaret: Why do YOU hide and I seek? Can’t you seek and I’ll hide? Hiding is the fun part. (The Flabby Tabby scowls frustratedly and puts a paw to his face) Why don’t we BOTH hide?
Garfield: AHH! Ugh! (He points vaguely behind Mary Margaret) You just cover your eyes and count to… (He thinks for a moment) 10,000! (She nods. He raises his finger) Then come and find me.
Mary Margaret: Woo-hoo! (She hops onto a rock and presses her head into a tree, counting and covering her eyes) 1, 2, 3,
Garfield: Chuckles
Mary Margaret: (continuing) 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, (With Mary Margaret distracted, Garfield races inside) 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15…
Garfield: Yelp! (He races through the kitchen and the living room) Straaaaaain! (He turns and grabs the banister as he heads upstairs) Grunt! (He enters the bedroom and slides himself under the bed. He then addresses the viewers) It’ll take her hours to find me under here. (yawning) I’ll have time to take a nap. I’m so tired. Snore! Sigh… (He nods off again) Snore! Snore!
(Back in the yard, Mary Margaret is finishing the world’s first speedrun of counting to 10,000)
Mary Margaret: …9,998, 9,999, 10,000. (She hops around and begins looking for the Tubby Tabby. She walks through the kitchen into the living room. A brief scan shows no sign of Garfield, but then she smiles. She opens the bedroom door and finds the cat sleeping under the bed)
Garfield: Snore! Snore!
Mary Margaret: I found you! (Garfield awakens to an unwelcome surprise. He tries lifting himself up, but is crushed under the bed, dazing himself momentarily. After a quick recovery, he can only stare in horror)
Garfield: AAHH!
Mary Margaret: (pointing) Why did you hide under the bed? Why did you want to be an anteater? What’s your favorite flower? (Garfield is pressed against the wall. He screams and trembles) My favorite flower is the petunia though I've never seen one.
(Later, Garfield and Mary Margaret are playing a board game outside. Well, Mary Margaret is. Garfield is attempting to catch some much-needed Z’s)
Mary Margaret: Did you ever go on a toboggan? I’ve never been on a toboggan, but I once ate an entire egg salad sandwich all by myself. I guess that’s not the same thing. Is it my turn to play? (She pauses. Garfield continues snoring, but is awoken once again by Mary Margaret) Why do you sleep like that? Do you enjoy snoring? Did you ever dream about being in Portugal? (Cut to the fat cat) I don’t snore. One night I stayed awake to see if I snored, and I didn't. (His heavy eyelids close again) Can you guess how old I am? Did you ever meet anyone named Arnie? (With Garfield momentarily out of commission, Bruno returns to the yard. What he sees is a fine appetizer with glasses) I once met a man named Arnie…
Bruno: Grr! (He charges toward Mary Margaret)
Mary Margaret: Except his name was Richard but I decided to call him Arnie anyway. (She is snapped up in Bruno’s paw)
Bruno: Grr!
(With his prize catch, Bruno carries Mary Margaret down the street)
Mary Margaret: Did you ever meet Abraham Lincoln?
Bruno: Chuckles
Mary Margaret: (continuing) Did you know he was born in a log cabin that he helped his father build? (Bruno glares at her)
Bruno: (slowly) Shut up. (When she does not, Bruno stares at her with wide eyes)
Mary Margaret: Isn’t an amazing coincidence that oranges are all orange, (Cut to a wider shot of Bruno running away from the camera) except when they first grow, when they’re quite green, so why not just call them greens? (Bruno turns a corner)
Bruno: Shut up!
(Nearby, Jon and Odie are returning home from their errands. Odie lazily glances out the driver side window from his passenger seat and sees and hears Mary Margaret in Bruno’s paw going in the opposite direction)
Mary Margaret: What’s your name? My name is Mary Margaret Mouse and Uncle Squeak is my uncle. Do you have an uncle? I have six uncles… (Odie quickly realizes what is going on. His eyes open wide with worry)
Odie: (concerned) Bark! (He turns around in his seat, attempting to keep an eye on Bruno)
Mary Margaret: (continuing) but my mom says Uncle Alfred is kind of a rat.
Odie: Bark! Bark!
Mary Margaret: (continuing) I think that’s a joke. Ha ha. Are you a cat? (She points at him) My mom says beware of cats because cats are mean and dangerous and they eat mice. If you’re a cat I shouldn't even be talking to you. (Without stopping, Bruno takes off) So… are you a cat?
(Jon soon rolls into the driveway, parks, and steps out of his car)
Odie: Bark!
Jon: I have to take the groceries in. (Odie hops out of the driver-side door)
Odie: Mmm.
Jon: (continuing) Go find Garfield and play with him.
Odie: Bark! (He races off)
(Garfield, meanwhile, is snoring in the backyard when Odie finds him)
Garfield: Snore!
Odie: Bark! Bark! (His barks wake Garfield up suddenly)
Garfield: Huh? (He looks around frantically) What? Who? Where? (He sees Odie panting and wagging his tail on the other side of the gameboard)
Odie: Pants
Garfield: (relieved) Oh! It’s you, Odie. I was just playing a game with Squeak’s niece here. (He gestures to the board, but cannot find Mary Margaret) Hey, where’d she go? (He grabs his head, worried. Just then, Squeak and Irv walk up behind him)
Squeak: We’re back, Garfield! What’s this about my niece?
Garfield: Well, we were playing a game here and, uh… (He puts his finger on his chin, thinking) I fell asleep.
Squeak: Yeah. (He shakes his head, unconcerned) She has that effect on folks. So where’d she go?
Odie: Mutters (His eyes are filled with worry as he tells his friends what happened to her. The Tubby Tabby leaps to his feet)
Garfield and Squeak: Bruno?! (Squeak’s eyes grow wide with terror)
Squeak: Bruno got Mary Margaret?!?
(Without a moment to lose, Odie leads the mice to where he saw Bruno. Garfield follows slowly, since he is still sleep-deprived)
Squeak: We’ve got to find her before… you know!
Garfield: I know! I know!
Odie: Bark!
(Elsewhere, Bruno had taken Mary Margaret to the park, away from any possible distractions)
Bruno: Shut up! Just SHUT UP!! And no, I've never been to Portugal!
Mary Margaret: Based on my experience, no one has. (OK, that was pretty good. She raises her finger) May I ask you a question?
Bruno: No! (His lip trembles, furious)
Mary Margaret: Just one question. It’s very important. (Fully fed up, Bruno relents)
Bruno: (exasperated) Sigh! Alright. (He raises one finger) Ask me one question.
Mary Margaret: Thank you. Are you a cat?
Bruno: Yes! (He stands triumphantly) Yes, I am a cat.
Mary Margaret: Oh. good to know. (Using some kind of superhuman strength, she flings Bruno onto his back, hard) Grunt!
Bruno: OHHHHHH!
(Nearby, Odie follows Bruno’s scent to the park, with Garfield and the mice tailing)
Odie: Sniffs
Garfield: Which way does the trail lead? (For an answer, the four of them hear blows landing and Bruno grunting in pain)
Bruno: Oof! Ah! Uh! Eh! Uh!
Garfield: Huh?! (He is bewildered, but Squeak points the way)
Squeak: That way! (Mary Margaret is flinging Bruno this way and that, slamming him repeatedly onto the ground, as if he were a ragdoll)
Bruno: Ow! Oof! Stop her! (The cat, dog, and mice watch, looking surprised) Yelp! OW! HELP!
Mary Margaret: Growl! (For her finishing move, she spins Bruno in midair…)
Bruno: Whoa! WHOA! WHOA! (before yeeting him onto a light pole) YAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (He lands with a thud, leaving him dazed)
Mary Margaret: Grrrrr! (She quickly calms herself upon seeing the others. She waves at them) Hello, Mr. Anteater, Uncle Squeak, and Mr. Puppy Dog. (Squeak is relieved beyond belief, if only a little shaken by what he say)
Squeak: (shakily) Come on back to the mousehole, Mary Margaret. (He waves his paw, gesturing for her to join them) You’ll join us for supper. (She walks toward the mice)
Mary Margaret: Got rid of a nasty old cat. My mom says cats are mean and dangerous and they eat mice. I don’t like cats. If I see another cat, I'll do the same thing to him. (The Flabby Tabby is left speechless at this, but the mice head back home. Odie and Garfield remain)
Odie: Huh? (He wags his tail and turns to Garfield, who grins sheepishly)
Garfield: Chuckles
Odie: Mutters (He gives his friend a worried look, but Garfield is unafraid)
Garfield: Nah! (He waves his paw dismissively) I’m not afraid of her. Why should I be afraid of her? (He points up) I’m an anteater. (He zips away)
Odie: Huh? (Garfield starts pecking the ground, looking for ants. He straightens himself and asks a bird)
Garfield: Any delicious ants around? Mmm, I sure would like some chocolate-covered (He wiggles his fingers) ants for dinner. (He goes back to the ground. Odie, however, is dumbfounded)
Odie: Hmm? (He tilts his head and blinks, still quite confused, and the episode ends here)
THE END