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"Halt! Officer Odie orders you to stop and help!"
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[The episode starts with Garfield watching television.]
Man on television: Be careful, Agnes! The robots have seized command of our world!
Garfield: Oh, I hate when that happens.
Jon: Lunch will be ready in five minutes, Garfield.
Man on television: We should have never let computers control so much of our lives! We could have stopped them from enslaving us if only we had… [A robot approaches both of them, the television buffers]
Garfield: Could have stopped them if what? How could we have stopped them? [Garfield fiddles with the on-board controls on the television to get it to work.] TV! I want my TV! Come back! Come back!
[Garfield pushes Jon, to show him the problem with the television and expects him to fix the television.]
Jon: Oh! No picture, huh? Looks like the cable's out again. I'll go call.
Garfield: How could you leave me like this? Haven't I been an attentive friend? Haven't I watched you like night and day?
[Jon telephones the cable TV company.]
Woman on telephone: You have reached the cable TV company. Press 1 to start. [beep] For English, press 2. [beep] For tech support, press 9. [beep] If you live on the west side, press 4. [hold music]
Garfield: I hope they hurry. I have to find out how to stop the computers from enslaving us.
Woman on telephone: Press 8 if your last name begins with the letters "A" through "M."
[Jon notices the smoke from the kitchen]
Jon: Oh! Garfield, I have to go check the casserole. Listen on the phone and let me know when a human being comes on the line.
Garfield: That could take months. I'm not sure if they have any at that company.
Woman on telephone: Press 5 if your TV set is color. [beep] Press 9 if there is a potted plant on top of your TV set. [beep] Press 316 if it is a fern.
Garfield: Uh? Boy, they want to know everything.
Man on telephone: Your call is important to us, so stay on the line.
Garfield: That's so comforting to hear.
[Odie appears]
Man on telephone: Your call is important to us, so stay on the line. [The day turns dawn] Your call is important to us, so stay on the line.
Garfield: If it's so important to you, why don't you take it?
Woman on telephone: Press 8 if you're fed up with listening to this terrible music. [beep] Press 77 if your eyelids are getting heavy. [beep] Press 9 if you're about to have a dream sequence.
[Garfield falls asleep next to the telephone]
Man on telephone: Your call is important to us, so stay on the line. Press 5 if you would like a pizza.
[In the dream sequence, Garfield awakens by the mention of ‘pizza’.]
Garfield: [beep] Yes!
[A pizza flies to him]
Man on telephone: Press 9 if you would like pepperoni.
Garfield: Of course. [beep]
[Pepperoni pieces topping the pizza]
Mancon telephone: You have ordered pepperoni.
Man on telephone: Press 3 if you would like extra cheese.
Garfield: I want extra, extra, extra cheese. ‘‘[triple beep]
[Grated cheese topping the pizza]
Man on telephone: You have ordered extra, extra, extra cheese. Press 5 if you would like anchovies.
Garfield: No, no. I don't want anchovies.
Man on telephone: You have ordered anchovies.
[Anchovies topping the pizza at Garfield’s dismay]
Garfield: No! I didn't order anchovies.
Man on telephone: You have ordered more anchovies.
Garfield: No! I don't want more anchovies! [groans] How do I get rid of anchovies?
[Tons of anchovies spiral around the pizza]
Man on telephone: You have ordered tons of anchovies.
Garfield: No! I have to get out of that house!
Woman on telephone: Press 9 if you would like to get out of the house.
[Garfield screams while he is getting out of the house, chased by the phones and bumps into Herman Post carrying a box. While bumping into Herman, the box lands on his head.]
Man on telephone: Press 11 if you would like to access your mail.
Garfield: Hey! Leave me alone!
[Garfield is running down the street while he is chased by the phones.]
Man on telephone: Your call is important to us, so stay on the line. Your call will be answered in the order received.
[Garfield turns around to cross the road.]
Garfield: How can I get across the street?
Man on telephone: If you would like to cross the street, press 4.
[Garfield presses 4 and the traffic freezes and he crosses the road.]
Garfield: Hey, this isn't so bad.
[Garfield sees Nermal tied to a rocket and the latter moans]
Woman on telephone: If you would like to send Nermal to the planet Beta-Blue in the Freen Galaxy, press 26.
[Garfield laughs at this idea]
Garfield: I'm beginning to like this. [beep]
[The rocket with Nermal tied on it sets off to space]
Nermal: [screams] Oh...
[Trumpeting sounds coming from a herd of elephants running down the road. Garfield scared notices the elephant are charging towards him.]
Garfield: I've stopped liking this! How do I stop a herd of charging elephants?
Man on telephone: If you would like to stop a herd of charging elephants, press 52878894249388928
Garfield: No! [screams]
[Garfield runs from the charging elephant herd and the man’s voice from the telephone is reading out numbers] Help! [Garfield desperately knocks on the front door of the store] Help!
[The elephant herd charging towards Garfield and the old man pulls him inside]
Man on telephone: Your call is important to us, so stay on the line.
[Garfield wakes up inside the store and is shocked to see the ghost of the old man who rescued him from the charging elephant herd.]
Garfield: Thanks. I needed that. I really needed that.
Old man: Can't talk to you now. I have to get back on hold.
Garfield: How long have you been on hold?
Old man: I don't know. What year is this?
Nathan’s mother: You've been on hold as long as I've been on hold. Sixty-three years.
Garfield: Sixty three years? Why didn't you just hang up?
Old man: I can't, I'd lose my place. They're going to answer my call in the order in which it was received.
[Garfield looks around and sees a number of people waiting on telephone hold]
Nathan’s mother: We've all been here so long, waiting on hold. None of us even remember who we're waiting to have pick up on the other end.
Old man: I'm not sure, but I think I was ordering a surfboard.
Garfield: Something has to be done about this. I need to come up with a brilliant idea.
Man on telephone: If you would like a brilliant idea, press 7. [beep and a light bulb literally appears above Garfield’s head]
Garfield: As you can see, I have a brilliant idea. And this isn't an old-fashioned brilliant idea. No, sir. This is one of those long-life, energy-saving brilliant ideas.
Esmeralda Brubaker: Oh, you can't reason with them.
Man 1: There's nobody to talk to.
Garfield: Then I'll have to find someone I can talk to. I'll have to find… a human being.
[All the human ghosts gasp at Garfield’s idea]
Nathan’s mother: But... there aren't any.
Garfield: Someplace there's one, and I'm going to find him.
Man on telephone: If you would like to find him, press 51.
Garfield: See? [beeping]
[Garfield levitates into a spiral universe]
Man on telephone: Press 5 if you would like a pizza.
[Garfield bumps into a metal door with the human being sign and see there are no humans]
Garfield: Okay, so where's this human being? "Human being." There he is!
Woman on telephone: If you would like to go in where the human is, press 1. If you would like to go to the South Pole, press 2.
[Garfield presses 2 instead of 1, therefore lands him in the South Pole]
Garfield: Oh no! I meant to press… one. [Garfield is shivering in the South Pole] I would like to go back where I was!
Woman on telephone: If you would like to go back where you were, press 7. [beep]
[Garfield lands back to the front of the metal door]
Garfield: Enough! I am now going to talk with an actual… human being!
[Garfield enters the studio room and unintentionally makes beeping sounds while walking on the telephone keypad. He notices a giant telephone with an eye in its display]
Garfield: Hey! Where are the humans?
Giant telephone: Humans? There are no humans.
Garfield: No humans?
Giant telephone: No, and there haven't been in years. By the way, your call is important to us, so stay on the line.
Garfield: No humans? [Making keypad sounds while walking] And here we've been worried about computers taking over.
Giant telephone: That happened long ago. But don't worry, your call will be answered in the order received.
Garfield: [groans] I get it now! You got rid of all the humans! You have them all trapped on hold! Trapped there for all eternity! Well, you won't get away with it! I'll stop you! I'll tell the world!
Woman on telephone: If you would like to tell the world, press 8.
Man on telephone: If you would like to tell the world, press your zip code.
[Mixed voices from telephones causing Garfield to freak out]
Garfield: No, no, stop! [screams while running away from the telephones] I don't want to be on hold! I don't want to press anything to do anything! Just stop that awful music! Stop! Stop!
[Garfield enters a spiral universe and awakens from his dream sequence when he hears the doorbell rings]
Garfield: Uh?
Jon: Garfield, can't you hear the door? Go answer it!
Man on telephone: Your call is important to us, so stay on the line. Your call will be answered in the order received.
[Garfield immediately places the telephone in its charging dock. He opens the front door to the repairman]
Repairman: About time you answered. I just wanted to tell you your cable TV was out, but we fixed it. You get any more trouble, call us at this number. [Gives Garfield a small card] Press 1 for tech support. Press 2 to schedule an appointment. Press 3 to cancel or… [Triggers Garfield from his dream sequence]
Garfield: No! No! It's a trick! You're trying to enslave us all! But you won't get me. I won't get trapped on hold for the rest of my life! You can't fool me! You won't answer my call in the order received! [screams and runs hysterically out of the house]
[Jon sees the repairman and the latter leaves]
Jon: Hmm, Garfield's hasn't been acting like himself lately. I'd better take him into Liz's office for a check-up.
Man on telephone: To continue this call in English, press 1. [beep] To speak to Liz the veterinarian, press 36. [beeps] To hear our office hours, press 8. [Garfield is running around the house screaming] To return to the opening menu and start all over again, press 2. To continue this call in English, press 1. [Garfield screaming]
[Episode ends with Garfield screaming running around the house]
THE END