[The episode starts off with Orson in swim trunks, surfing]
Orson: [Laughs] Watch me shoot the curl. Watch me hang ten, ee-uh, four. Here comes another wave.
[Scene zooms out to reveal the surfing's actually fake]
Orson: [To audience] I'm trying to invent Mudsurfing.
Wade: Oh! This is a calamity [Scene cuts to him running with mail] and a catastrophe. What a disaster. Oh, woe is all of us.
[He trips over a rock and crashes into Orson. They both surf across a mud puddle, then across the field and right through Roy's chicken coop. They soon crash into the side of the barn off-screen. Scene cuts to both of them on the ground, with Orson's swim trunks now on his head]
Orson: Wade, you have got to stop panicking like that.
Wade: But this is bad, bad news, Orson.
Orson: Wade, there is no news in the world that could be so awful that it warrants that kind of panic. What is it?
Wade: Your brothers are coming to visit.
Orson: [Stops, then starts panicking] Oh, this is a calamity and a catastrophe! Ah! Oh, woe is everyone, me especially.
Wade: [Grabs Orson and crashes to the ground] You told me never to panic.
Orson: But this is serious. You never heard how my brothers used to treat me. [Thought bubble appears beside him] They used to play Runtball with me, and I was the runt.
[Flashback begins. Orson's brothers are seen walking towards him]
Mort: Hey, brother.
Wart: Yeah.
Gort: [Snorts]
Mort: Let's toss around the old pigskin, shall we?
[They stop behind Orson, who's reading some Garfield comics]
Gort: Ooh, let's.
Orson: [Looks up; gulps]
[Wart grabs him]
Orson: Hey, guys. Don't do this.
Wart: [Jumps to a random spot] 17, 91, eleventy-six. [Throws Orson below his legs] Hike.
Mort: [Catches Orson] Go out for a pass. [Throws him]
Gort: [Giggles] I got him. I got him. [Misses him; Orson falls into a well] Aw, shucks. I missed. [Puts his hands together as a halo appears on top of his head]
[End of flashback]
Orson: My brothers coming here is the worst thing in the whole world.
[Bo walks in]
Bo: Hey, chill down, pigaroo. Don't get your bacon in an uproar.
Wade: Hey Bo, you're always so calm and unlike I. How do ya do it?
Bo: There's no point in gettin' bananas just because you got some bad news or, like, things went wrong or they're sneaking music in behind you to cue your song.
[Bo puts on some sunglasses and begins singing "Keep Cool"]
[Bo]
If someone keeps pickin' on ya,
Makin' fun of ya all the time,
There's always a way to get through it,
Without you losin' your mind,
Just stay cool,
Don't get uptight,
Just stay cool.
Don't let little things get to ya,
Everything will be alright,
Just stay cool. (Heh-heh)
If your baseball breaks somebody's window,
Or there's a wolf at your front door,
No sense in worrying about it,
You've been through stuff like this before,
Just stay cool,
Don't get uptight,
Just stay cool.
Yeah, that's right,
Don't let little things get to ya,
Everything will be alright,
If you just stay cool.
I mean cool, mm-hm
Orson: Great advice, Bo, but I have a real problem here.
Bo: Hey, man, just scope it out. There's only two kinds of problems in the world: the ones you can solve, and the ones you can't. No point worrying about the ones you can solve, and no point worrying about the ones you can't. Ha-ha-hey, it's simple, man. It's true. You just gotta do a double scope man. Cool out.
[Song resumes]
[Bo]
If your garden just ain't growin',
If you sink when you start rowin',
Stay cool, (He-hah)
Make like an icicle,
Be cool,
Yeah, cool,
Cool,
Real cool.
[Bo runs off as the song ends]
Wade: You should listen to that person there. That is one cool sheep.
Orson: You're right. I'm gonna follow his advice. I'm gonna be cool.
[His brothers are suddenly heard off-screen]
Wart: Hey, brother, where are ya?
Orson: Right after they leave. [Runs to the shed]
[Scene cuts to Bo walking to Orson's brothers]
Mort: Hey, Wool-Face, [Hits him] [Snorts] where's the runt?
Bo: Hey, give it a rest, man. Cut your brother some slack.
Gort: [To Wart, sarcastically] Awwww, the sheep's gonna hurt us.
Wart: Hey, sheep, take it on the lamb.
[The brothers laugh. Wade runs up behind Bo]
Wade: You're wastin' your time, guys. You can't get Bo here mad.
Gort: Oh, we can't, can't we? [Laughs and snorts]
Bo: [Nods no] Afraid not, fellas.
Mort: Suppose we was to pull on your wool. [Snorts] Would that make you mad?
[He pulls on a string coming from Bo's arm, causing him to lose the lower half of his wool. Bo, who's unfazed, walks to a shed and gets a spare pair of wool pants, which he puts on. He walks back to the brothers]
Bo: No, that wouldn't make me mad.
Gort: [Grabs Bo and dribbles him like a ball] Supposing we were to dribble you like a basketball, and bankshot ya. Would that make ya mad?
[He throws Bo into a basketball hoop. Bo is still unfazed, however]
Bo: No, that wouldn't make me mad.
Mort: Aye, this guy's no fun. [Snorts]
Wart: No fun at all.
Gort: Yeah, let's go find our runty brother. [They all walk off]
[Scene cuts to Wade standing by the shed Orson's hiding in]
Wade: [Hums] Gee, I wonder where Orson is. He must have left town. Orson must be far, far away, in another country or something.
[The brothers come up to him, grinning]
Wade: [Trembling] Please don't hurt me. He's in here. [Opens the door; to Orson] Sorry, Orson, I'm a coward.
Orson: [Walks out] I know, and I understand.
Gort: Hi, brother.
Wart: Care for a little game...
Mort: ...of Runtball?
[They all laugh. Scene cuts to Bo bathing himself until he hears Orson, which diverts his attention]
Orson: Guys, don't do this. Guys, please don't do this!
[Mort throws him and Gort tries to catch him, but purposefully misses]
Gort: Oops, I missed.
Orson: [Hits the ground] D'oh!
Gort: [Lands on Orson] I got it!
Mort: [Lands on Gort] No, I got it.
Wart: [Lands on Mort] No, I got it.
[Scene transitions to Gort holding Orson in place while the other two brothers are seen arguing]
Mort: I wanna I kick the extra...[Snorts]...point.
Wart: It's my turn.
[They both oink at each other until Bo walks in with a rope]
Bo: You guys wanna play tug-o-war? Might get me real mad if you won.
Mort: Really? [Laughs] Sure, sheep.
Wart: Oh we can get back to Orson later.
[Scene transitions to the brothers holding on one end of the rope]
Gort: You, uh, [Chuckles] got it wrapped tight around you? [Chuckles]
Mort: Sure thing. [Snorts] We're gonna pull that there sheep right into the mud.
Bo: [Walks in] How do you figure on doin' that?
Wart: Well, you're on the other end of this rope, and we, uh...
[They realize]
Gort: Uh, who is at the other end of this rope?
Bo: Bus.
Gort:Bus?
Bo: Yeah, the 3:14 bus to the next county, dudes.
Mort: [To Wart] Aye, brother, what time you's got?
Wart: [Checks watch] 3:14.
Gort: Uh-oh.
[The bus drives off, sending them with them as they scream]
Orson: Oh, thank you a thousand times.
Wade: And you got mad, Bo. I never saw you get mad before.
Bo: Oh, I get mad, Wade. I just save it up for when folks are mistreatin' my friends.
Orson: But what do we do when the bus comes back with them in four hours?
Bo: He-hey, like, no sweat. [Gets out a train schedule] Got a train schedule right here. They'll be just in time for the 7:25 for Californ-i-a.
[Scene cuts to all three walking off]
Orson: I like it.
Bo: It's all just a matter of staying cool.
End of episode